Attachment- and Needs-Oriented Parenting and Teaching

Scolding, threats, force and punishments are not only useless, they are absolutely harmful - not only for the parent-child or teacher- child relationship, but also for self-esteem and the healthy development of children.

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Parenting should be easy; if we need pressure and coercion there is something wrong in the relationship with our children. Our children naturally follow the lead of those adults they are bonded to. They also learn from them by copying them.

So, being a good parent or teacher to children has nothing to do with methods or techniques, but with bonding and relating to them. Bonding and connection are the first priority of human beings. Parenting and teaching are primarily a relationship, not a skill. Attachment is not a behaviour that needs to be learned, but a connection with our children that we need to seek, (re-)build and maintain.

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In this course, you will learn how exactly you can build a strong connection with (your) children, time and again, even after ruptures such as conflicts, arguments and anger. I will help you maintain a good relationship with (your) children.

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You will also learn to understand the message behind each of (your) children's behaviours. In exercises, you will practice ways of communicating and dealing with (your) children's anger, fear and frustration as well as with your own anger. You will learn how to stay calm and relaxed, even under great stress. Thus, you will be able to lovingly and effectively accompany (your) children and help them to learn how to deal with strong feelings and conflicts.

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Furthermore, you will also get the opportunity to get to know yourself better: to identify your triggers, to get to know your own limits and needs, and to better and lovingly set boundaries. For if we want to strengthen relationships with (our) children and fellow human beings, we always need to start with strengthening our relationship to ourselves.

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Based on the latest research results in attachment and brain research, neuro- and behavioral biology and developmental psychology, this course will also teach you the basics of non-violent communication according to Marshall Rosenberg. You will learn the 4 steps of Nonviolent Communication that will help you to better recognise and meet both (your) children's needs and your own. You will learn to find new ways to encourage cooperation and sharing that are based on attachment and relationships, never pressure or even punishment. You will acquire the valuable knowledge how to best support (your) children in their mental and emotional development.